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"Just Hitched!" The Value & Challenges of our Differences

“We are polar opposites!”

“He’s so unorganized!”

“I just wish she was more adventurous.”

“He doesn’t listen to me.”

Him: “I thought you could wash it all in the same load of laundry. You really have to separate them?”

Her: ”Well, yeah! Unless you want pink t-shirts!”

This list could go on and on! Why? Because, we are all so different. We each have different personalities, gifts, strengths, weaknesses and abilities. That’s what makes marriage so amazing, and at the same time very challenging. Getting “hitched” to someone who is different or even opposite from us can make our lives so much more effective. Most of us, however, don’t know how to value those differences. We resist them. That’s why marriage is one of the greatest opportunities for an individual to grow, be challenged, and ultimately be fulfilled.

The term “hitch” has several meanings, but Hitch and Spin was designed around it’s meaning in reference to marriage. The term “hitch” dates back to the early 1500’s or so, as far as we can tell, and it was initially used in relation to “hitching” two horses together to pull a wagon. It somehow transitioned to the idea of a man and woman getting married, because of the power of two lives merging together to compliment, help, strengthen and support one another.

A couple begins dating. At first it’s all about attraction, connecting, first impressions, and the joy of being together. Initially they may not notice the major differences...or at least the difficult ones. (The idea of “falling in love” tends to prevent most people from recognizing them.) Being together is priority and requires no effort at first because there’s no “wagon” to pull yet! Getting “hitched” changes things. And there’s a powerful truth they realize in time ... working together, balancing out each other’s strengths and weaknesses, two joining together as one ... they complete each other.

One is organized, the other isn’t. One loves the party, and the other would just rather stay home. One is great managing finances, and the other not so much. One loves to step up and handle tough situations, the other would rather step back and let it be handled. This is where the great compromises and challenges of marriage begin. It’s why God created marriage. We need someone to compliment our differences, help us recognize our flaws, stand beside us through thick and thin. As a husband and wife, we can accomplish so much more than we ever could apart. That’s why we get hitched!

At Hitch and Spin, we value and appreciate those differences. That’s why in premarital counseling the very first thing we do is give a personality inventory to the engaged couple. It’s not only fun and enlightening, but it also helps identify each personality, how each functions and work best together, and how to recognize the value of our partner. It’s always amazing to see how attracted we are to someone so incredibly different, and how powerful that relationship can become because of those differences. When a man and woman “hitch” their lives together, intentionally, a new adventure begins. It’s a journey across a new frontier pulling the “wagon” of their lives in harmony over the hills and valleys together.

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